So I’ve just come back, earlier than intended. Unfortunately, the sun was so bright that no matter how I had my camera set it was all looking over exposed and washed out. I’m going to go out again later, hopefully the light will be a wee bit dimmer and I can get some better shots. The one time I want Argyll to have crappy weather is the one time there is a glorious sunshine!
I did notice something though. When I’m walking in Dundee, I nearly always have earphones in, listening to music, unless I’m at the Balgay Cemetery, but when I’m walking here I nearly never listen to music.
I put it down to sensory overload. Most people experience it on some level, but I feel like I experience it to extremes. It’s when there is too much going on around you that you become stressed out and a bit anxious. Because of my anxiety, I am always trying to focus on everything. In my flat that’s okay, there’s only a few things to concentrate on- Hope dancing round the kitchen, her “delightful” club music (Salsa Tequila is the worst ear worm) and maybe Alia chatting in the background. That much is manageable.
But when I go out for a walk in Dundee, there is much more. Children crying, multiple people having multiple conversations, the general land/cityscape cars going by, dogs barking, whether there is dog shit on the ground, all the people walking past, sirens, and much more. I try to take in everything that I can see and hear, and when it’s like that it is too much, and I quickly reach a state of very high anxiety. So I put my earphones in, because immediately I don’t have to concentrate on half the stuff that I normally would. My flatmates always tell me not to because I’ll get jumped, but the risk of that is low, and I’d rather take that risk than put myself into such an anxious state, which can take ages to come down from.
When I walk here, there is very little to concentrate on- the landscape, the sound of the loch, seabirds, the faint hum from the road and the various people I pass. It is pretty chilled. I don’t become overloaded at all, because it’s so much calmer. There’s none of the rush and crush.
On another note, I forgot how friendly people here are. When I’m out here, whether or not people know you, they ALWAYS say hello. In Dundee, which I still consider pretty friendly, you’ll maybe get a smile, but no one says hello. It’s quite nice.
Anyways, I’m going to spend the next couple of hours sketching/doodling, and hopefully head out again later.
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